Jennifer Toledo is a young missionary whose words have refreshed and encouraged me. In the recording below, she describes a vision from the Lord that vibrantly depicts the connection between abiding in Christ and living out justice.
It’s well worth listening to the detailed description Toledo provides from minutes 31:38 to 46:08, but I’ve provided a summary below as well.
The vision begins with the Lord leading Toledo into a quiet, intimate room in the Father’s house. The room is beautiful and extravagant – “fit for a queen,” Toledo says.
In stark contrast to the rest of the room, a small, wooden trap door catches Toledo’s eye. She asks where it leads, and the Lord says it goes to the weeping room – a place that’s very special to Him, where He spends most of His time.
Toledo wants to go into the weeping room, but the Lord says few are actually willing to go there because it’s so lonely and painful. It’s unlike any other room in the house.
Yet the weeping room is where the Lord chooses to spend His time. To be deeply intimate with the Lord is to sit with Him in the weeping room. So Toledo decides to descend through the trap door.
The further she goes in, the more she finds herself separated from the rest of the world. Eventually she must get on her knees to enter the room.
Once inside, she sees a chair beside a small window – nothing else. The Lord takes a seat in the chair and Toledo soon realizes that through the window, God sees every act of injustice and hears every cry of anguish.
In the weeping room, one can see and hear “every single cry coming from the earth, of every person, every child crying out to God…every child being raped, every child being abused, every homeless man on the street crying out to God, every single act of injustice blatantly in His face.”
The Strategy Room
After a time of interceding in prayer and weeping, Toledo notices another small door that leads to what she discovers is the strategy room.
The door to the strategy room is so small that she can’t fit through it. She must spend time in the weeping room getting to know the heart of God, “feeling His heart, choosing to see what He sees, choosing to care about what He cares about, choosing to let [her]self be open and broken and a mess” to become smaller in size.
She attests that after enough time in the weeping room, “things of yourself, your own agenda, your own comfort, your own ministry and life and whatever you wanna do begins to just fade away, until you get to a point where you’re so small you can fit through the door, and then He can entrust you into the strategy room.”
Until that point, you cannot be trusted there.
In the strategy room are “revival, worldwide global transformation, power encounter strategy.” All the things we try to hurry into without sitting beside the Lord, knowing His heart, weeping on behalf of His children, and letting go of our agendas.
I’ve found the weeping room so painful and myself so powerless that I’ve rushed to get into the strategy room. I want to quickly address the problems and make the anguish dissipate.
In the process of hurrying, I enter another room entirely – one filled with pride, anger, resentment, and eventually cynicism. Rather than growing smaller, I push myself to the limits in hopes of one day filling the vast space before me.
I leave the Lord by Himself in the weeping room because weeping will never be enough. I become convinced there is no strategy room and I must take things into my own hands. If anything is ever going to change, I must do it myself.
What pride. What unbelief and lack of trust.
God tells us through Scripture, “…weep with those who weep…Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.”1
What if, like Jennifer Toledo describes, God asks me to sit in the weeping room with Him? What if that is how I can most intimately know Him and take part in the worldwide transformation He’s promised?
It makes sense in light of Scriptures like Micah 6:8 that He would ask such things of us: “And what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” (NKJV).
Do justice. Walk humbly with your God.
What if doing justice never looks like what you’ve heard or expected? What if it means heartache and weeping?
And what if God never lets you into the strategy room? Are you willing to only weep with Him and trust that He is bringing justice nonetheless?